Cry Love was first presented as a reading at Pearl Studios in NYC, July 2016; the first production of Cry Love was at NY Summerfest 2018.
Thank you to all the most amazing supporters, friends, family, and audience members for being there for me through the CRY LOVE experience. I haven’t been ready to really talk about it, let alone think about it since I came home at the end of September. It felt big and yet manageable. Overwhelming yet doable. I checked it off the bucket list. I set out to write a show that someday would end up in NY and one way or another, I went to NY and produced this show and now I am home. It was the experience of a lifetime.
And this is how it happens. (I am putting this on a t-shirt)
My goal was to see this show produced on stage and to see if it actually worked at all. I needed to see if the story made sense and if the response was positive, confused or disinterested.
Luckily, the wonderful cast, crew and musicians made the show workable and believable. They allowed me to play out my vision and my story from a practical standpoint, while also supporting the “following my dream” purpose as well.
There were moments in rehearsal or on opening night, when I was overcome by how much I was feeling. How much pain and joy it brought me, and how scared I was to share it with an audience and my family. Autobiographical, in a non linear, imaginary vs. reality world way, the storyline allowed me to play around with the meanings and explanations of things. To come back at the audience with “ Well, what do YOU think it means?”. The answers ran the gamut. And that was hugely satisfying to think that maybe there was a discussion to be had over the production. That people might want to process it over a glass of wine or a cup of tea. It could be simple and it could be complex, and I loved that duality. The “angel of death”, the “father”, the “guide”, “God”, the “lover”, etc. was the audience description for the one character: Cries of Humanity. Amazing. Or maybe some people saw that as confusing. At least curiosity was alive and well.
We cannot let fear stop us from doing what we need to do. What we want to do. On a creative level, on an emotional level, on a psychological level. I am not so good at the physical level of things because I am scared of dogs, swimming in the deep end, going downhill on a bike or skis, or driving in a car in the snow. BUT, I did go to NY following some hefty health issues, and I survived. I took each day as a challenge to hydrate, eat well, rest and stay calm. The staying calm part was a little tricky, because we were working in some interesting conditions, dealing with big personalities, a bit of unprofessionalism here and there, humidity, miscommunications etc. Was it smooth sailing? Not always, but I was strangely prepared for that.
My greatest joy was working with the musicians. That was where I felt safest, most knowledgeable, clearest. There was no “drama”, just pure love of the music and how to turn it into something real and textured and emotional. I think I value consistency the most, which the musicians gave me every single day. They were so present. So kind. Dependable.
I am not sure what I want to do next with the piece. I love this show and I am proud of the work we did. I know there is more work to do on it, and more audiences I would like to share it with, but I am too tired to get going on the marketing and promotion, or the planning of next steps. I think a time of rest is called for right now. I will think about it in the new year when things feel fresh and new.
Thank you for listening and supporting and loving.